WINTER SOLSTICE

I was sure I'd written about the Winter Solstice a few years ago, but when I looked for it, it wasn't there. So, just in case it somehow snuck off and left Thursday's Child in a lurch, I'll try again.

The Winter Solstice in the Northern Hemisphere occurs around December 20th/21st. On the calendar it's the day when the earth is at such an angle that we up north have the least amount of sunlight and the most amount of darkness. Actually--scientifically--it's only a moment, not a full day. Then the earth begins to start its tilt the other way and we begin to add a minute or so each day, and that continues until the Summer Solstice (June 20/21, approximately).

For those of us who have been moaning/whining/ranting about the Dark Mornings and Dark Evenings--well, the solstice is Good News! Change isn't instantaneous, nor is it even immediate. Think of it as letting us get used to the change.

If you can't accept that--you might consider moving to another hemisphere for the next six months.

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Since the Winter Solstice signals change, here are some thoughts to entertain you:

Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year. Ralph Waldo Emerson

Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right. Oprah Winfrey

Year's end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us. Hal Borland

Wishing you blessings heaped up and overflowing for the coming year! See you next time!

Thursday's Child

FLOAT . . .

Back in my working days, we had a "floating holiday"--our choice of a day off that would help us get through some thorny patch of too-much-to-do. Or whatever.

Some people took their birthday. Nowadays this would be called a ME-day. But back then, it was just "my birthday."

The "floating" part was especially nice. I got to choose whatever day I wanted off. There were some limitations, though--we couldn't use our floating day to extend a long weekend (Thanksgiving weekend, for example) or to add to our annual week or two weeks of vacation. But the big advantages were enough.

A floating holiday meant:

• a day off during regular working hours so we could get to the license branch, the bank, the post office, other county or municipal offices
• we could go out of town to visit family or friends on a weekday
• we could do all kinds of errands during daytime (and maybe day light) hours that would normally have to be done after work; winter meant probably getting home 'way after dark.

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So that's the "historic" connection.

Today--here we are at mid-December . . . people are starting to count down to Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, a party, a school program, maybe a wedding . . . anyway, it's Counting Down Time.

It's probably, for a lot of people, Big-Time-Stress Time. So, why not float?

Take a floating day for yourself. (Think of it as a gift to yourself, that no one else can give you. How's that for special?)

Here are a few guidelines:

• doesn't have to be a full day
• you can take a few hours or half a day
• you can use the time for yourself, or for someone you care about, someone who needs help or just needs company
• you don't have to tell anybody about it if you don't want to

Not sure what you'd do? Here are some suggestions:

• go by yourself to a mall or shopping area or specialty shop; spend as long as you like there, whether or not you buy something
• take yourself out for lunch (or breakfast, or afternoon tea)
• spend some time in a nice park; there may be other people there, but you don't have to be social (really!); or, be social if that floats your boat
• read a book you've been wanting to try. Even if you only get through a chapter or two, you'll know if you want to continue once the holiday rush is over.
• listen to music you like--Christmas? Not Christmas? Jazz? Baroque? Piano/organ? Vocals? Choral groups?
• watch a movie you like--you know, the ones nobody else in the family will watch or the ones they make fun of. (This is your day, remember. Do what tickles your fancy.)

If you use up only half a day, schedule the other half for another time. Before or after the current holidays. Doesn't matter. It's a floating day.

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Feel better? Sometimes just knowing we have a choice helps lower the stress level.

And if you're not stressed? Bless you! Share some of yourself with people who need it.

Next week we'll celebrate the Winter Solstice. In the meantime, be blessed, take care of yourself and others, and take a deep breath. 

Thursday's Child

 ARE YOU UP FOR A GAME?

[Revisiting something that might perk you up while you're stressing the coming holidays. Take a break--play the game!]

As you've no doubt gathered, I'm a word person--I like words. I collect words. I use them when I speak and write and think. Of all the possibles, words are very likely the basis of my existence.

Other people are number people. They think them, they live them--words are much lower on the scale of existence for number people.

I understand about numbers--about, I said, not, I understand numbers. My understanding is quite basic, learned by fifth grade: addition, subtraction, multiplication, division (long and short). I also know about decimals and fractions. As I say, by fifth grade I knew all that. (Yes, I took math in high school and college, but not much of that stayed with me. It went off and hooked up with a numbers person for its happiness.)

So! Back to words.

We're starting a new month, and already today we're on Day 7. (See? Can't get away from numbers.)

I propose a game--activity--to accompany us through this last, and nearly blackout-dark month of the year, until we can start writing 2022 on our checks. Are you up for it?

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I like simplicity. So this is a very simple game. Only a couple of rules:

1--choose a new word each day--long, short, whatever part of speech--but just one word. FYI: a hyphenated word is considered one word. 

2--think or write about or just meditate on your chosen word for that day. See how many times it comes up for you--words have a habit of doing that; once they're in your head, they're like those ear-worm songs that won't go away.

That's it! No need to keep a record. No need to tell anyone what you're doing. (Unless you want to share the game with someone else; but remember, it's a one-person game. No competition.) No prizes or awards, except whatever fun you get out of doing the game.

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Some examples:

If you like nouns, you have a whole world of choices: dog, cat, candy, pizza, tree, presents, ribbons, money, truck, happiness, anticipation . . . you name it. 

The nouns may spawn a few more: mess, expense, greed, disappointment, joy, excitement . . . .

Your choices will come from your life and your imagination. Have a go! Might lighten your day.

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Now, for you numbers folks:

--there are 31 days in this last month of the year. How about working with each day's number?

--does the number 2 ring a bell for you? Or 7? Or 19? Think about each day and its number, what it means, if anything; or if it means nothing, make up a meaning for it.

--do you prefer even or odd numbers? Do you have favorite numbers? Or lucky numbers?

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For all of you--word or number people--by the time you get to the 21st day of the month, you'll be past the shortest daylight day of the year, and it's all up from there.

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Q&A:

What if I miss a day? You missed an opportunity to play. Start again the next day.

What if I don't want to play? Go do something else--wash the dog, shop in a busy store at rush hour, eat something really bad for you.

Why are there no prizes? Because they're not good for you. If you only play to win a prize, what have you learned? Probably only how to play to win that prize.

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Start when you're ready . . . the fun is about to begin.

Blessings,

Thursday's Child

Winter Solstice--coming soon!

 INTERRUPTIONS - PT. 2

Did you miss me last week? I managed to tangle with a virus that practically robbed me of a Thanksgiving dinner because my appetite up and left town. But I managed to enjoy a lovely dinner at my Ohio daughter's house. 

A month ago I promised you I'd come back with some more thoughts on the topic of Interruptions. The virus last week certainly qualified for the topic of the day. So here goes with Part 2..

Part 1, you may recall, covered the most likely annoyances I call Interruptions--not getting to finish my thought, my sentence, and so on.

Today--well, this is a horse of a different color. Big-time Interruptions. We've all had them. Here are a few you might recognize. Let's start back when we were kids:

• For some reason, you come home from school and learn that "we're moving." First you've heard of it. Never picked up on any clues. Nobody hinted. Just, "get your stuff together and put it in these boxes."
  
• At school--you go to class and there's a totally different person up in front of the class, sitting at the teacher's desk. You have a new teacher. How come? 
• Your best friend since kindergarten moves away.
• The school bus you've ridden ever since forever shows up with a different driver--who looks big and mean and doesn't smile like the nice lady who used to drive.

For a kid, those are Big-Time Interruptions to Life as Usual. Sometimes we know the why behind the change. Sometimes we don't. What we do know is that Things Are Gonna Be Different from Now On.

As an aside--when I ran into those things in my young life, I started to get uneasy. I mean, if those rock-solid parts of my life were shown to be crumbling to dust, what the heck else was gonna happen?

Stay tuned. There's lots more.

Okay, fast-forward, as we say nowadays, to adulthood. You're the parent or teacher or bus driver. Life seems to be rolling along pretty smoothly, considering. (Nobody's life goes only smoothly. Don't let them kid you.)

Then--whap! Interruption. Somebody gets injured in a car accident. You get a medical diagnosis you never thought you'd have to deal with. Your job goes away, for whatever reason. And life is never going to be the same again. That's Interruption.

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I hesitate to bring this up, but since some of you probably watch the news or listen to it in the car as you drive around, or get information on the Internet or from friends--one way or another, you're going to know about a whole bunch of Life Interruptions: wildfires, floods, crime, war, pandemics and other medical emergencies . . . . Whole lives changed in a short time. Families torn apart. Homes destroyed. To name just a few situations.

When we get to this point, we're talking about Life-Changing Decisions. There is, sadly, little opportunity to Go Back to what we once were. Many of us have tried that route. It's closed.

What we can do is go forward. Not, probably, in the way we thought we would go before. Maybe not straight ahead--more of a side step to find a different path. Many of us have had to experience this kind of shuffle--after a death, after the loss of a home or a job or a relationship.

And while that is the most likely way to deal with some of Life's Interruptions, it may be the best thing we can do for ourselves, our families, or our associates. I won't go so far as to say Interruptions are good--that they shake us out of our self-satisfied little rut so we don't stagnate--no, Interruptions may indeed do that, but we'll only see a positive result if we look for it. And, maybe even more important, accept it.

Time line? Heck, no! May take us all our lives. May be resolved in a few days/months/years. But we know we're on the right track if we keep on keepin' on. Who knows? We may help somebody else who's on that same rocky path keep their nerve. Always worth a try.

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There may be more to say on Interruptions, but I'm done with this subject. Next time we'll be looking at a different picture on the calendar--the days will be starting over at "1"--and if I can stay away from viruses and flu bugs, I'll be around to join you in the new month.

Blessings,

Thursday's Child

remember--forward is forward

 

GIVING . . .

Tomorrow in the U.S. we celebrate Thanksgiving Day--a time of offering our thanks for the many blessings we've received.

There's another way to look at Thanks-giving--emphasis on giving. Here's a poem by Alberto Rios, poet laureate of Arizona, that addresses that topic. I hope you like it.

When Giving Is All We Have

Alberto Ríos

                                              One river gives
                                              Its journey to the next.

We give because someone gave to us.
We give because nobody gave to us.

We give because giving has changed us.
We give because giving could have changed us.

We have been better for it,
We have been wounded by it—

Giving has many faces: It is loud and quiet,
Big, though small, diamond in wood-nails.

Its story is old, the plot worn and the pages too,
But we read this book, anyway, over and again:

Giving is, first and every time, hand to hand,
Mine to yours, yours to mine.

You gave me blue and I gave you yellow.
Together we are simple green. You gave me

What you did not have, and I gave you
What I had to give—together, we made

Something greater from the difference.
 

[Copyright © 2014 by Alberto Ríos. Used with permission of the author.]

Born in 1952, Alberto Ríos is the inaugural state poet laureate of Arizona and the author of many poetry collections, including A Small Story about the Sky (Copper Canyon Press, 2015). In 1981, he received the Walt Whitman Award for his collection Whispering to Fool the Wind (Sheep Meadow Press, 1982). He served as a Chancellor of the Academy of American Poets from 2014 to 2020.

 

 WHAT A DIFFERENCE A DAY MAKES!

That's the name of an old love song, but today I'm not going to explore romance--I want to talk about how much can happen in "24 little hours."

For instance:

• trees that last week had a full compliment of leaves--all colors, including green, are now nearly completely naked
• what used to be a shade tree is now a skeleton--still lovely in its own way, but definitely providing no shade whatsoever
• last week I wore a lightweight denim shirt for a jacket when I went outside; today, I've broken out the lined winter coat that's long enough to cover my tush
• also rummaged through the closet for a long scarf to wind around my neck a couple or three times
• along with the longer lined gloves that have been waiting their turn
• and, to round out the chilly-days wardrobe, the ear warmers (like ear muffs but worn around the back of the neck instead of over the top of the head)

And that's not all. Our current menu has shifted into winter mode:

• Tuscan Bean Soup--full of turkey sausage, cannellini beans, onion, chicken broth, and a bunch of spices and herbs
• rice and pasta dishes: risotto; mac 'n' cheese
• a few frozen dinners - we're partial to Saffron Road oriental meals with rice--dinner in less than less than 8 minutes in the microwave
• also gluten-free pot pies--best done in the conventional oven to brown the pastry
• and the ever-present roast chicken and roast veggies

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I'll admit, all the above didn't happen in a 24-hour period. But it sure seemed like it. Remember the old saying? "If you don't like the weather, wait 5 minutes and it'll change." Well, right now, it's "If you don't like the season, wait a day or two and it'll get worse."

We're definitely on the slide down to the winter solstice. October flew by. November is a shorter month, with things going on (elections, Thanksgiving dinner, a family birthday), including the preparations many people make for Christmas. (We often see folks hanging their outdoor lights on Thanksgiving Day afternoon.)

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In order to hang onto whatever grip I have on reality, I try to go with the flow of the 24 hours. Do what I can--what needs to be done--maybe even do some early prep for a later 24-hour period. So if you don't see much of me, remember--I might be inside the house trying to keep up with the differences that rush my way that day.

Wishing you the fortitude you need to press forward.

Blessings,

Thursday's Child

 INTERRUPTIONS

[Please consider today's post a "taster"--definitely more to come on this topic!]

If you're one of those fortunate persons who never gets interrupted, then feel free to go play solitaire or Wordscapes or wash your hair, or something.

For the rest of us--let's do a little dissection of INTERRUPTIONS.

Interruptions, in my experience, seem to fall into three categories:

• incidental interruptions - something I say triggers a thought in the other person and I get interrupted (usually causing me to forget what else I was going to say) (a mental power outage)

• intentional interruptions - something I say triggers a strong response of "Oh, no, it's nothing like that!" and an argument/discussion begins

• non-sequitur interruptions - I'm explaining something, and the listener says, "I never realized how crooked your front teeth are." Talk about conversation stoppers!

I might as well confess, right here and now: I don't like interruptions. They throw me off. They're like walking on a perfectly clear sidewalk and hitting the one patch of ice left from the last storm.

Any analysis of interruptions would have to include the big question "Why"--why do I respond badly to other people horning in on my thoughts and speech?

There are probably a number of reasons, but I can give you a few. For example:

• All my life I've been a reader. In a book, people continue to talk and recite and narrate, the story line proceeds, and nobody interrupted. Or, if they do interrupt, it all makes sense...on paper. Funny thing, though, real life doesn't work that way. People interrupt each other all the time.
• When I taught freshman composition I was the only one who talked. (This was back in the day--before online classes.) I presented the information, encouraged class participation, and often met only silence. Lulled me into thinking they were listening.
• Later, I had four little kids at home all at once; in order to keep things running smoothly, everybody heard (and learned, I hoped) the same rules. They seemed to take it all in.
• Finally, and probably the most likely reason, is the element of surprise. A close first cousin to interruptions, surprise throws me for a loop. Without a doubt, surprise is definitely not for me.

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You've probably heard the old expression: "There are two kinds of people in the world--those who say/do/act/believe (something or other) and those who don't."

In my experience, the words always and never somehow wiggle into that piece of pseudo-wisdom.

And in my further experience, one of the two kinds of people is more than likely to interrupt whatever it is that I'm saying at the moment. Not quite always, but certainly more often than never.

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See you another time with more on the subject of Interruptions. In the meantime, wishing you an uninterrupted and joyful week! 

Blessings,

Thursday's Child